Super Disappointment!

Well...
as per the title, this might be a bit of a rant/venting session.
As you know Colin and I are expecting our second little Anderson.
Before we found out we were expecting I can contacted a local group of midwives for some information about their practice and when I should contact them... etc.
I found out I was pregnant on November 5th, I remember because a wonderful lady in our ward passed that day and... I have the email that I sent to midwives in my sent folder saying that was the day I emailed them. Coincidently, I emailed them BEFORE I even told Colin I was pregnant. Does that not tell you something about how badly I wanted a midwife? I wrote them telling them I was pregnant and my due date. (which I emailed them my due date TWICE!)
Anywho, they wanted to schedule me for a 'consultation' December 3rd, which didn't work for us because they wanted 'my partner' to be there. I told them it didn't because 'my partner' worked. (incidently, what 'partners' don't work in the middle of the week in the middle of the day?) They then scheduled me for December 17th at 5:30 which worked somewhat for us and was the earliest they could see me.
**SIDE NOTE** There are only 2 midwives practicing in the Red Deer area and I understand they are in high demand so the waiting for 6 weeks to meet them was understandable... at the time!
A couple weeks later (me being 7 weeks) they cancel the 'consultation' and reschedule it for Wednesday, January 5th at 6:00pm. (making me 13 1/2 weeks!) I agreed, again understanding that women don't always go into labor at the most convenient times and they were just starting up their practice.
Not a word from them from them on.
January 5th comes, we were on time but they were running late. Ok, fine... I would want them to take as much time with me as they needed, isn't that why I wanted a midwife? None of this in and out the door in 10 minutes stuff?
So 'my partner' and I head in for our 'consultation'/AUDITION...
**SIDE NOTE** Colin is the early morning seminary teacher and gets up every morning around 5:30am. Brant has also decided to 'try' and cut his back molars this month! So we had been up multiple times in the night the past week AND Colin had been out side in minus WHO KNOWS degree weather installing. Needless to say we didn't look the most impressive!
Who would have thought that in order to receive low-intervention, natural pre-natal care I would need to sell myself?
They ask us what we know about midwives, why do I want a midwife, previous labor experience etc etc... My due date... AGAIN!
In the end they said we needed to go home and discuss if we felt midwives were the way we wanted to go. Colin and I looked at each other perplexed! Um... wasn't the fact that I'd waited 2 months with no pre-natal care tell you that I wanted a midwife? I stated that we were there because we wanted a midwife, we had discussed it but they still insisted we 'talk' about it. Whether or not that was their cheap cowardly way of saying "we don't want to take you on as a client" who knows! But it was pathetic!
So, I went home 13 1/2 weeks pregnant with still no certainty to my pre-natal care. I waited till the following Monday. Wrote them a pleasant email, stating that we were comfortable going forward with midwife care etc etc, and FIVE days later (I'm now 14 1/2 weeks) get an email stating they are too full in July to take me into care.
Oh let me tell you, I was and still am LIVID!
I contacted them as soon as I found out and definitely early enough for them to fit me in. They pushed back my 'consultations/auditions' until I'm sure they already knew July was too busy but were 'too nice' to, I guess, let me know!
Now, to give a bit of history, my doctor decided to resign. He left his practice at the end of November, leaving me with no constant doctor. Which didn't bother me as I was already talking with the midwives about receiving pre-natal care. But now I'm 15 weeks pregnant with no doctor, no midwife and NO pre-natal care!
I know have to call and beg doctor's offices to take me on as a patient hoping they'll take pity on me!
It's all so frustrating! All I wanted was a natural birth, with practitioners who support your choice for a low-intervention, natural birth. Now I have to try and 'shop' for a doctor who will respect that choice and let me and MY body make the decisions.

As much as I'm disgusted at the level of professionalism shown by these 'midwives' and as much as I'm livid, I am actually pretty calm. I feel comforted by Heavenly Father that everything will be fine and this was the way it was supposed to be, but it's always so scary when faced with all the uncertainty!
That's all for now!

Little Anderson #2 (LA#2) is definitely active, I'm 15 weeks and already feeling flutterings! Which calms me a little knowing that things are probably ok! My belly is getting bigger every day but I asked Colin if "I was starting to look pregnant or if I was just looking fat?" and he refused to answer the question, which tells me I still just look fat! BUT I can tell it's a bump! :)